Poor Memory

I suffer from a really bad memory. I don’t remember the names of people, places or things very easily. I don’t have strong memories of my childhood, save for a few pieces that wouldn’t even make a blockbuster length movie. For as long as I can remember, my memory has been poor.

It took me over a week to learn the name of my co-worker and office mate. It took me months after that to remember the names of the majority of the people in my office. Beyond those I see every day, I still have little to no recollection of their names.

Beyond work, I have troubles remember what I’ve done in the past. Sabine would remember events with vivid detail, and I’d barely remember that I was there. One doctor told me that it might have more to do with the importance I place on these details than the quality of my memory.

Each day, I sift through thousands of articles online. My general browsing of the web probably uses more bandwidth than the average iTunes user. I’ve conditioned myself to quickly analyze articles, pull out the few relevant facts, and move on to the next. I’ve been the person that people come to in hopes of finding something online since early in my high school career. I could sift, search and process vast amounts of information and find nearly anything online given enough time.

The problem is, that the lack of memory is a huge hindrance. Sabine says that I have a better memory of the bad days, and bad emotions than the good days, and because of this, I feel more negative. Her thought is that if I could remember everything as she remembers it, that I would be happier, more content, and quicker to forgive. I am sure a few others would probably agree with her.

In the end, I live with this minor affliction without doing much about it because as much as Sabine might protest, I think I forget the bad, as much as the good. It leaves me with a sense of balance, and makes it easier for me to look forward, never living in the past.

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One Reply to “Poor Memory”

  1. I can understand how difficult it is to have a poor memory. I have a poor short term memory, some times I can’t remember at all what I’ve eaten during the day even though it wasn’t that long ago, or whether or not I finished off a particular task I had set for myself. I’m worse when it comes to peoples names, places, and song titles. Numerous times over the years people have asked me “oh have you heard such and such song title before?” to which I will reply that I don’t have the faintest idea, I would actually have to listen to the song to recognize whether or not I have heard it before.

    It used to frustrated me. I was completely convinced I lost my hair brush, because I couldn’t remember what I did with it just hours before (turns out it was in my purse, but I didn’t find it until a week later, after I bought a new one). I’ve come to realize that *everyone* has quirks, and what the quirks are is not quite as important as finding people in your life who understand and accept them. Thankfully, I’m finally coming to terms with them myself, and have far more acceptance of who I am as a person.

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